Wellness Hustle

Wellness Hustle (00:44)
Welcome back to another episode of the Wellness Hustle. We are so excited you're here and we have a really cool topic for you. And one that I think is really relevant at the end of January, which is, I guess the beginning of February is motivation, right? Everybody wants it. We all lack it occasionally. It's hard to get going. And it's even harder to keep it. Especially now, right? Oh, God. Days are still short.

gosh, I can't wait. saw something like an Instagram or TikTok or something that said that it was like 42 days until the sun sets at seven. And I was like, yes, we're almost there. We're days. Yeah, but we wanted to dive into the science and give you guys some tools for getting and staying motivated. And I'm really into like the psychology behind things and why we do and make the choices that we make as people in society. we have a lot of cool things to cover. Do you want to tell them what it is?

Sure.

So here's what we're gonna be covering today. Understanding the two types of motivation, understanding the psychology behind motivation, common motivational killers, what to do when you're struggling to start, and the final one is...

our 60 second motivational reset. That's my favorite because honestly, I've been struggling with motivation recently. And so the 60 second motivation reset has really helped me. Yep. So let's start first by understanding what motivation actually is. And that really is the difference between intrinsic and extrinsic motivation. Right. And what are those two? Yeah. So I think it's really simple because in it's internal versus external.

Exactly. So the intrinsic one is driven by personal satisfaction. Like I work out because I love how I feel afterwards. And that's my husband. I cannot believe this man every evening, four o'clock, he makes himself a cup of coffee and he disappears in the gym. I don't know how men work out in the afternoon. It's amazing. I mean, he is amazing. Like, yeah, we love Pat. We love Pat.

And then extrinsic, which is driven by external rewards. that's, work out to get compliments or hit a certain number on the scale. Right. So that's outside of yourself. Exactly. Sasha, what is your intrinsic and extrinsic motivation? I think those changed over the years, but where I am right now is I obviously love feeling strong. I love feeling healthy, energized.

And also I love feeling strong for the new sport that I picked up a couple years ago. That's dressage. And that's been my intrinsic. Okay. What's your extrinsic? And extrinsic, I feel like I need to be best version of myself for my clients. So if I'm not walking the walk, just talking to talk, I just feel like it's not really, you know, it's not who I want to be. It's accountability for you. Yeah, it is.

So mine are intrinsic is like, want to have a long, healthy and full life and just like operate at my full potential. And then I think my extrinsic is want to similar to you be accountable and to live by example and motivate others to do the same. hopefully that's what this podcast does. Right. And I think that's basically, that was the biggest reason why we wanted to start this podcast. So we aligning very much so on our extrinsic.

It's important to understand that motivation is different than discipline. 100%. Those two are completely different things. Yeah. So we also wanted to talk a little bit, like you can have intrinsic and extrinsic motivation and understanding what those are, important, but you need to have the discipline to keep that motivation going. motivation is like the emotional drive or desire to take action. Yes. So that's often like,

You know, influenced by external factors, which again goes to the extrinsic. It's like, okay, well, I want to leave an impact on society. And so I want to be accountable and I want to help others. Right. So, the discipline is the ability to take action regardless of motivation. This is a huge one. People don't really maybe think about it, but that's where discipline is so important to continue with your motivation.

So actually maybe you're not working for motivation. You actually need more discipline in your life. Right. And yeah, that's all built through habits and structure and consistency, which I think Pat is a great example of that. At four o'clock he has this cup of coffee and he works out. That's it. And it relies on a commitment rather than your feelings, which motivation can be very like, it can go by the wayside because you're like, right now I don't feel like it. Like I never feel like working out. Right. Like not many people do except Pat. feel like he is.

is the exception. exactly. Motivation is just like super unreliable. And I feel like discipline is more sustainable. Yeah.

So for the long-term success, you need both motivation, yeah, because it's going to light up the fire. It's like a little spark, but the discipline is going to ensure that the fire keeps burning. Yeah.

I love that analogy so much. And it is, it's a mind shift, sorry, a mindset shift. And I think like, I wanted to get into some of the science behind it because I learned about Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs when I was in college and it has helped me a lot to understand just for those of you who don't know, Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs was developed by Abraham Maslow.

He's an American psychologist and he developed this in 1943. Wow. And I love it because it really brings us back to the primal pieces of human nature. And he introduced this in a paper that is called A Theory of Human Motivation. And the reason I'm bringing that on because it's human motivation is what we're talking about here. And it's basically proposing that human needs are arranged in a hierarchy based on the physiological needs at the bottom of that chart.

So yes, survival, right? So it just it's explaining motivation as a progression of needs, human needs. Yeah. And just like what Sasha just said your basic survival needs before pursuing higher levels of personal growth are most important. So if you don't have access to food, right, your motivation is going to be different. You always see people who are really, really successful and they started out with nothing. Tony Robbins.

Right. Was starving. Like they didn't have food sometimes. were on food stamps. Yes. So he has a different kind of drive and discipline because he knows what it's like to starve. Exactly. So let's jump into those real quick.

So the first one is psychological needs, survival motivation. Those are like simple things like food, water, sleep. We all know how we feel if we don't get sleep, exercise, just the basic health needs. And it's interesting because the last few weeks I've been struggling with my health because I just have a lot on my plate right now.

And I'm finding that can't do anything else. I literally am just like, how do I get three meals in? How do I get to the gym? And how do I go to bed on time and like work? That's it. I just, I need to make money and focus on my health. Exactly. And if you don't have health, and that's another reason why we started this podcast. If you don't have health, you cannot have anything else that is successful long-term. Right. So the next one is your safety. that's security and stability motivation. Like if you're not financially stable,

or you don't have a safe environment or health security. So if you're through an illness, then you need to handle this one first. Motivation might look like working out to prevent disease or like changing your eating habits. Exactly. And then the next one is love and belonging.

Yeah, so the love and relationships obviously are very important to lot of people, but we can't get to it. We can't make them a priority if we are not taking care of ourselves. Again, that's what you always like to say about the mask, the oxygen mask being pulled down and you've got to put it on yourself first and then you can share it with your kid or whatever. Exactly.

And then next is esteem needs. So that's achievement and confidence motivation. So that's just like getting recognition. So that's the validation that you get. You know, if you constantly are doing something great and nobody's recognizing it, you kind of burn out a little bit. Yep. Or you don't see results. You kind of out a little bit. Yep. So this is where you're seeking like the motivation to hit your personal goals, improve your body composition or prove something to yourself or to somebody else. Yep. And the next one is self actualization.

So that's a purpose driven motivation. So it's a personal growth. when you slept well, then you can probably read that book to kind of grow within that fulfillment and reaching for full potential. That's where you can really reach for full potential once all those things that we just talked about are fulfilled. And that's when motivation becomes like super intrinsic because you're really just doing things to just be great. Exactly.

take yourself to the next level. And again, the reason I wanted to bring that up is because that motivation is gonna change depending on where you are in Maslow's hierarchy of the higher levels kind of shift towards intrinsic motivation, which I think is interesting, because you stop looking for validation towards others because you've already established, I feel like I'm there with this podcast. My last podcast, I was like,

I want to know, like, I want everybody to think I'm cool and I want them to like me and I want them to da da da da. And this, I'm like, I just want to help people. Like, I just want people to know what I've been talking about for the last three years and been obsessed with and it's helped me. wanted to help them. Exactly. And I feel like that's the ultimate goal for everyone, right? To be in that place where you don't give two poops about what other people think. You just follow your gut, your heart, and you just.

love your life and love what you're doing and trying to help others. think that's what's all about. So I wanted to also touch on Tony Robbins kind of newer perspective, goes, just, you know, obviously that was in 1943. a years passed by. exactly. So I feel like Tony Robbins.

he kind of created, he added on a sixth one. There's only five in Maslow's hierarchy. He had another six of the human needs and they're very similar to the hierarchy of needs, but I feel like they're more applicable to like today's day and age. And it breaks it down so simply. And his concept is that you're going to take everybody values two of these things. People aren't really going in the order because we have social media, right? Okay.

You can get validation right out. Like we're kind of looking for extrinsic thing. totally. So I'm going to run through these really quick. the six human needs, according to, Tony Robbins is certainty, which is comfort and security uncertainty or variety, which is adventure and challenge significance, which is recognition and importance. That's kind of the social media thing. Yup. Connection, belonging and relationships growth, personal development and learning, and then contribution, which is giving and serving others.

I love the addition of the contribution part. Yup, me too. Because I feel like once you get that intrinsic motivation, you can go out and say, I've been practicing this for three years. I feel comfortable in it. I know how to make the adjustments. And now I feel comfortable sitting with Sasha and saying let's talk a little bit about this.

I can, I've done it. So I know what it takes to do that thing. And I can say, I can say with honesty and comfort that like, this is how I did it. And so it feels more secure to me. So I can kind of turn external now and not be like grasping at validation that kind of doesn't fulfill me. It's more of a giving the contribution part is more of like a giving part of it, right? It's like, I want to give back the thing that I know. So

essentially like these needs are going to shape our emotions, behavior and our actions. And each of those needs has a negative and a positive depending on the intention behind each and every one. So if you're going to do something that's going to give you validation and to my point, like I was looking for validation because I wanted people to tell me I was great.

And now I'm like, I don't think I'm great, but I have some things figured out. So I don't look for that validation. Right. It's taken focus away from you to others. Like, I don't care about what people think about me. What I care about is how I can help others. Exactly. And a lot of people put like significance first without doing anything else and hoping that they're going to be significant.

to people and that will make people love and connect with them. But if you were to start with connection and contribution, then maybe you would just get that significance. I think it's the only way to get significance. Otherwise it's empty and kind of meaningless. Yeah. Like what are you significant about? Just being significant. Right. Just doesn't make any sense. So it's like putting a wagon in front of the horse. Is that what you guys say in the United States? Or we say it in Russia, I forget.

I don't even know. no, we say it in Russia. Wagon in front of the horse. Yeah, right. Yeah, exactly. You're putting the wagon in front of horse. Yeah. And I think that that's where you get discipline versus motivation, too. it's easier to be disciplined about something when you're doing it from a place of service. Service. 100 percent. Because it's not just about you. Other people are relying on you. So you kind of have that little bit of what is the word?

Should we use fire? Fire, but also accountability. what I'm looking for. So there is a piece of accountability when you're not doing it for yourself. for yourself. So moving on from that, what are the biggest obstacles to motivation that vary from person to person? like, what are the most common challenges? I think number one is lack of clear goal. So people kind of think, we talked about this in the previous episode. I want to get fit, right? But there's no specific what is fit.

What does it mean to you? Right? So it has to be a clear goal. What does it look like for you? So solution is set smart goals, which are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, time bound. Right? So it's with everything. It's not just your wellness. It's with everything in life. I love this next one too, because relying too much on willpower. yeah. You're only as strong as your willpower, but if your options are

You know, it's you're always gonna fail and there's only so much willpower you have in a day. Well, it's like, don't keep the chippies in there. Exactly. Because you're gonna eat them. Right. So you have to like build habits and systems so that discipline takes over when motivation falls through. Right. Yes. And the third one is fear of failure or perfectionism. I'm so good at this. It's been taking me for the longest time. You got it figure it out because I don't. Well.

You just have to start and do it. Because when you're willing to wait till you get perfect at something, you're never going to start because there's no such thing. No. And you need to be willing to be the beginner and failure and look like an idiot. Yeah. Like maybe you can't pick up the dumbbells. Maybe you have to do just like body weight. Body weight. Yeah. Okay. And it's okay. Eventually you'll be able to do that. You'll be able to pick up heavier weights. Like exactly a progressive low.

Exactly.

I think the other thing in that space is like talking about fear in general, like fear stops you from doing so many things and it's really just your ego. It's ego, but fear, why, what are you fearing? Like what are you scared of? Not being perfect. Right. So that's why they go together. Yeah. You're fearing of looking like an idiot. Or not getting that external validation that you want. Yeah. There we go. The fourth one is overwhelm and lack of structure. So, you know, big goals feel really intimidating.

and will essentially just give you paralysis. right. So I think here it's like breaking goals into small manageable steps and then taking keyword consistent action. This has been an area for me that's been really hard because I get very overwhelmed with how many things I have to get done. That's been January for me. Yeah, same here. I feel like, but you have to write it down on schedule in your planner. And then it looks like you look at the planner, you look at your

piece of paper and you're okay, I'm doing this. So instead of sitting there and being overwhelmed, you have a plan so you can just cross things over as you go. It's like what you always say, just like schedule it. Yes.

Okay, so then the next one is external destruction and instant gratification. I think you can talk about external distractions for sure. Hi, I have ADHD. No, I yeah, I'm super squirrely. Like I am distracted. I hate when people DM me. Like I'm so bad at DMs. You guys never DM me if you need something for me because it's overwhelming for me. Like if I go into social media,

I'm now lost. I go in there and think like, I got to respond to so and so. And next thing I know, I'm scrolling for however long. I mean, I'm watching reality TV right now and I watched three episodes last night and it was past my bedtime. And I'm like, how did I even get here? I'm so good about my nighttime routine. How the hell did that happen? boy. So it's just like, what are your external distractions? And then those are making you procrastinate. Time is like the only thing you cannot get back. You cannot. It is the most valuable resource that we have.

Mm-hmm, we waste it waste it constantly. On stupid shit constantly. I am good at that, too Yeah, so I think I create an environment that supports focus and like removes temptations The way that I do this too is I set alarms for myself Okay, so in the morning part of my routine is that I can read I could get lost in a book and forget what time it is and sure easy So I will set an alarm at seven o'clock that says go to the gym And then it's like I have to get up. It goes up and go. Yeah

And I just tell myself I'm only allowed to have one show at night. No more. Because I've done too many times where I watched one after the other and next thing you know, it's 1 a.m. and I have to get up at 630. What an idiot. No, I'm not doing this again. Next one is emotional and mental barriers. stress, self doubt, negative self talk. I mean, you're only as good as you talk to yourself. All right. And your stories, you create it, right?

My family was unhealthy, so I'm unhealthy. My mom could never lose weight, so I will never be able to. I tried every single thing there is to try. It's just not working. It's not for me. I feel like in this area, just reframe those setbacks that you have established that are setbacks as learning opportunities. Yeah. Like embrace the failure almost. And say, okay, I tried this. It's not for me. I'm going to try that. Yeah. And then lack of immediate results. Oh, well, yeah. Hello.

I mean, I don't understand why I don't have a six pack and my biceps aren't perfect. So I just eat one salad. I'm, I don't get it. That's crazy. I think what this is like your solution is just like track your small wins and trust the process and be real with yourself. It's not going to take a month for you to get to your big goal. Yeah. So have small goals, have big goal and measure your small goals because the big goal is not going to be measurable right away. Yeah. Break it down and simplify it.

for sure. So like with all of this information, what's your like, what's your go to advice for someone struggling to start? I always say body in motion stays in motion. I love that. If you are feeling like you're stuck and you can't get out, you just have to do one small thing, the low hanging fruit, whatever it is, just start there. Even if it's like, okay, I'm going to do

five squats when I'm brushing my teeth or whatever, something little, something so little and easy and start there. Once you start there, then you can think of the next step. But as you're sitting on procrastinating, you just pushing that more farther and farther away from you. Yeah. I think for me, it's like, I like to simplify it. So breaking it down into like smaller days and just like taking action on the one thing, just like you were saying, right? Like a body in motion stays in motion. I also love the concept of

like the power of one more, which I got from Ed Mila. It's a great book. If you haven't read it, you should. Yeah, it's great. But it's just that like, if you are doing a set and you're supposed to do eight reps and you're on the fifth one and you're like, God, I'm never going to get to the eighth one. Like I'm never going to make it. I don't think I can do another one. It's like, just change that mindset to like, I can do one more. Can I do one more? Can I do one more? And next thing you know, you've done 10. Yeah.

I think it's great. I think you can apply it to a of different things, but I play that game with my clients all the time. No, it's fun. It's fun. Yeah. And the other thing is to like put your phone away. Like for me, I will put my phone across the room and just like be laser being focused on whatever's in front of me. And sometimes I do that even when I'm watching TV. Oh, you have to do otherwise. Why are you watching TV? Because you're going to be on your phone. You just, like we're doing too many things. guys are just simplify it.

Okay, so if you had to give like a motivational reset in 60 seconds, like what are you doing in 60 seconds to just like go? This is what I do with myself. I don't know if it's gonna work for others, but I stole it from Tony Robbins. Again, Tony, if you're listening. Thank you.

He said that you just, when you're doing a hard thing, your brain has to tell the body to do it. You count to three and you do it. So that's what I've been implementing lately and it's working. I started that with my face plunge, the ice face plunge, and I would just get to the bowl with ice and I would be like, okay, you're doing it, one, two, three, and I go. And the more you do it, the better you become. So then you can conquer other things in your life.

Like right now I'm not standing in the front of the bowl anymore with eyes. just do it. But the other thing I started to do is implementing cold shower, like for a few seconds after my normal shower, before I get out. Yep. And that is a flipping bitch. That's I, it's a torture like beyond belief, but I have this thing that I already kind of familiar with that my brain knows that I'm going to tell my body and my body better do it.

So now I stand in the front, I'm ready to stare at you like crazy. Yeah. I stand in front of my shower and I was like, all right, one, two, three. And I flip to the cold water and I just go in and I hit every second of it. But when I get out, A, I did it and B, I feel so much better. Like my energy is different. Like I just love that. I don't do it every time though, because it's torture, but I do do that. It's interesting that you bring that up because I...

I always like to start adding things in, I wanted to add a cold shower in before I go to the gym. I want to earn my coffee in the morning, and so I'm thinking about adding that in, but it's funny that you brought that up. Yeah, try it and let me know. But try that. Tell your body to do it. One, two, three, and do it. I've done them before. They're brutal. They suck. I mean, also, if you watch the face plunge video on our Instagram with me, I did the like, you can see it happening. I'm like five, four, three, two, and I jump my face into the water bowl, which is freezing cold.

And then I was like, whoa, no, I hated that. I hated that. And I jumped back out. But it's like, you kind of have to understand that you have to do the five, four, three, two, one. And then you have to like take action and kind of just like force yourself to be uncomfortable. Right. And then you get your own respect for that. That's a big thing too is like you're, generating your own. Look, here's the thing. A muscle only grows if you tear it.

If you want big muscles, you have to literally damage your muscles. Yeah, that's what we do in the gym with those dumbbells. So if you want to do a face plunge, it's going to be really fucking uncomfortable. Yeah. And then you just have to do it and then you'll get a result. You do, you

So mine and I can't take full credit because I got it from Mel Robbins and I kind of just like adapted it but it's from her five second rule and I added like a little twist to it. But essentially, and the best way to explain this is if you're laying in bed and you don't want to go do something. I did this recently on the couch. I was sitting on the couch and I like, I cannot. the couch at night is I can't go. I don't want to do the dishes. So I was like, okay.

If I don't do the dishes, then I'm going to wake up and there's going to be dishes in the sink. And then I'm going to have to wash the dishes in the morning and then the dishes. So I'll kind of like do that. Like what are the negative outcomes if I don't do this thing? Just kind of setting up like that goes against the kind of person I envisioned myself to be. Yep. So then from there will be like, that's one of my goals is to be better. You you're kind of going through that like mental shift and I let myself do that for a second.

And then I'll count down from five and I'll do five, four, three, two, one. And I'll just be like, go. So you still do count. See that counting is helping. It's weird. It's weird. But you have to tell yourself, yeah. And you have to go. You can't just count a hundred. I fell asleep back on the couch. It's not going to work. I think too is like, cause I even say go at the end of it. I'll be like, five, three, two, one, go. Oh, I say go too. Especially in that cold shower. I'm like one, three, go. Yeah.

and then you tense up. You're like, got this. It's going to be okay. Breathe, breathe. It's always harder in your mind. Oh, it is. Everything is harder in your mind than it is in reality. I also think that like, I mean, it is. It is, 100%. You think that lifting weights is going to be hard. It's not that hard. It's not that hard. Only like, less couple reps are hard. Exactly. Getting started, it be the easiest part. We just don't do it because we create all these mental blocks of why we can't.

So I don't know. I have this thing that your mind is so powerful and your body is so capable. Yeah. So you have to be in control of your mind and your body. So your mind should tell your body what to do and you should do it. That's basically what we training ourselves to do here. All those like negative thoughts and all of those

things that I think I'm not capable of because I've created some sort of self-doubt or some sort of roadblock that doesn't even exist yet. I don't even know that that's gonna be the outcome. I've just created that concept in my head that it's gonna be too hard and I won't be able to do it or whatever it is. Those don't even apply once you just do it, just take action. Right, one, two, three, go.

So yeah, taking action is really just the key thing, you guys. It's really not that complex. the end of the day, motivation just comes down to doing it. Yeah, discipline. And consistency. And consistency.

And in the end, it's all about commitment to your big goal. Taking small little steps.

checking them off the box that they makes you feel good and continue, know, put your head down and keep working at whatever you're working. Just, you know, drilling in one place of the wall. I always say, just don't get scatter-minded about different things. Just pick one thing and focus on that. Yeah. And some days would be harder and some days would be easier, but just build those habits. Yeah. And give yourself grace. You can always get back on the bike.

But yeah, we appreciate you guys for being here. Yes, thank you. Yeah, challenge yourself and stay motivated and let us know what are the biggest

roadblocks for you guys to stay motivated. Thank you guys for tuning into another episode of The Wellness Hustle. You guys can follow us on Instagram at Wellness Hustle podcast. And yeah, don't forget to subscribe and leave a review. Like, share, all of the things. Do all the things and we'll see you on another time. Yep. See you.